Learning to Let Go and TRUST

“When we worship the Lord, let’s remember that He is in control. Nothing alarms Him, or takes Him by surprise. Nothing is too big for Him to handle, or so small it escapes His attention. When the winds of my world begin to blow, He remains seated. When raging waves surround me, He governs their temper…I need not be moved … Because the Lord is seated and sovereign…He alone is sovereign.”

- Ronald James -

At this point in my life I feel as though I’m completely riding the line. I’m in the land of In-between. I’ve graduated high school, but not in college yet. I’m almost an adult, but not quite there. I’ve got an incredible job with Revolve, but haven’t started yet. I’m living at home, but when my job starts I’ll only be here three days a week. Its just this awkward place in life where everything is almost here but not quite. 

Lately I’ve been asking myself the question, “What kind of spiritual lesson am I’m supposed to be learning through all of this?” And I hadn’t realized what it was until I was talking with a good friend Amy. She said it plain and simple, “He’s asking you to give up control and trust Him.” When she said it to me in just 10 simple words, it hit me: He is asking me to do the very thing that I have been telling Him I was so scared of doing and haven’t done 100%. I realized how much of my life I have said the same thing over and over to Him, “Alright God, its all yours. Take all of my life into your hands. Do what you will. I trust you. I give it ALL to you.” Three days later, I realize that nothing major has happened and tell Him, “Ok God, I know that you are still working on all of this, and probably still taking some time to plan my life out, so while your doing that, let me just take this BIG LITTLE thing over here and I’ll handle it myself.” To which He responds, “But I thought you were giving it ALL to me, Marissa? I’ll let you take what you want and then once it doesn’t turn out the way you had planned, I’ll still be here, ready and willing to take it upon myself to work out.” 

All of my life I have done this. Whether it be taking financial issues or relationship issues into hand, I tend to do this with God. I fake Him into thinking He’s getting all of me, when in reality I know that I’m not willing to give it all to Him. But who knew! He’s smarter than that, but still just as loving and accepting. 

I went to a small group for a church I am starting to go to, Grace Chapel, and the leader talked a lot about how we make ‘idols’ out of things in our life, putting them before God and trying our hardest to deal with them ourselves. At the end he posed a question, “What are your idols that you are taking ‘control’ of and placing before Him?” I realized how much I was putting before him and trying to ‘take control’ over. 

This week especially I have realized that God is showing me the ares of my life that I need to start working through in order to fully let Him live in me. I heard this many MANY times. When we open the door for Christ to live in and through us (not just with us) He starts shining lights on the areas of our lives that need to be changed and/or let go of (i.e. what we need to give up). So obviously the things that He is shining lights on are my control and trust issues. What am I not willing to give up? What am I trying to control? What am I doing my way?

Bottom line: What am I not trusting HIM with?

So my question to you is, what are you not willing to give up? What are you holding captive because you think you can do it better than He can? What are not trusting Him with?

 

On a side note, check this video out. My dad showed it to me and I thought it was pretty incredible/creative! Or watch it here for a clearer picture. The song is “Again and Again” by Bird and the Bee.